Dimensions: 7 inches tall
Material: High-quality PLA (Polylactic Acid)
Weight: ~1.5 – 1.8 lbs
Shipping Time: Made to order; ships within 7-14 business days
Edition: Available year-round. Always in stock. Always iconic.
Packaging: Ships in luxury minimalist packaging worthy of your investment
Authenticity: Comes with a hand-numbered Certificate of Authenticity
Forged in the depths of economic despair, The Eggsecutioner™ is more than an egg — it’s a statement of dominance. A matte black 7-inch relic for those who don’t just survive market chaos… they crush it.
All-Black, Stealth Design – Elegant. Intimidating. Zero yolk.
Uncrackable Confidence – Outlasts fragile markets and even weaker hands.
Powerfully Weighted – Heavier than your regrets, lighter than your tax burden.
Desk Presence of a CEO – A conversation-starter with no chill.
Investment-Grade Absurdity – Because real luxury is satirical and made of PLA.
Place it on your desk, throne, or vault. Let lesser eggs tremble.
This item is made to order. Each egg is 3D printed, hand-finished, polished, and painted — ensuring no two are exactly alike. These are not mass-produced. They are meticulously made, because true power takes time.
Dimensions: 7 inches tall
Material: High-quality PLA (Polylactic Acid)
Weight: ~1.5 – 1.8 lbs
Shipping Time: Made to order; ships within 7-14 business days
Edition: Available year-round. Always in stock. Always iconic.
Packaging: Ships in luxury minimalist packaging worthy of your investment
Authenticity: Comes with a hand-numbered Certificate of Authenticity
Forged in the depths of economic despair, The Eggsecutioner™ is more than an egg — it’s a statement of dominance. A matte black 7-inch relic for those who don’t just survive market chaos… they crush it.
All-Black, Stealth Design – Elegant. Intimidating. Zero yolk.
Uncrackable Confidence – Outlasts fragile markets and even weaker hands.
Powerfully Weighted – Heavier than your regrets, lighter than your tax burden.
Desk Presence of a CEO – A conversation-starter with no chill.
Investment-Grade Absurdity – Because real luxury is satirical and made of PLA.
Place it on your desk, throne, or vault. Let lesser eggs tremble.
This item is made to order. Each egg is 3D printed, hand-finished, polished, and painted — ensuring no two are exactly alike. These are not mass-produced. They are meticulously made, because true power takes time.
